Sure, I think with excitement that my son is almost old enough to take the Red Cross babysitting course, and I know he really, really wants to take it... but I don't want that day to come too quickly. He has all the time in the world to be an adult. Childhood is fleeting.
This is on my mind, because I was hanging out with a dear friend today - a wonderful, giving lady, who is moving back to the U.S. in less than 2 weeks. Boo hoo. :(
Anyway, she mentioned conversing with other friends who were talking about when to cut off breastfeeding. Her children are older, so this isn't an issue for her, but she chimed in that I nurse until my child self-weans. I guess this is a pretty foreign concept to many moms. Those who can and do breastfeed go into it with the idea that it's only for 6 weeks, 6 months, or 1 year.
Everything out there says to keep nursing a child after 1 year, as long as both mother and child wish to continue. There really is no reason to force an end to that aspect of the mother/child relationship at a certain point, except for parental comfort. For example, I do have a personal limit - it's 3-years-old. Gavin was 2 1/2 when he self-weaned and, up until that time, his nursing was limited to 5 minutes before his afternoon nap and 5 minutes before bed.
Another interesting thing my friend mention was attachment parenting. She knows a person here who follows the AP philosophy... and complains nonstop about doing so. So she told that person that I happen to be an AP parent, and I do quite well with it; her point being, do what's right for you as a parent. Don't do something because it's popular or you want others' approval.
AP is not for everyone. Breastfeeding is not for everyone. Hey, I homeschool, and that isn't for everyone.
Parenthood is as individual and unique a journey as childhood. Rather than complain about what's not working, step back and figure out what will work for you. Don't keep doing something if you don't like it or don't see the benefit of it.
Nobody is judging you. (And if they are, they really need to find something better to do!)
Copyright (c) 2013 Wendy L. Callahan
Agreed. And you're damned either way. If you don't use attachment parenting, you're accused of being too harsh to your child and not meeting his/her needs. If you DO use attachment parenting, you're accused of smothering the kid and not letting the child grow/learn on his/her own. Me, I'm not an attachment parent. It just ain't my bag. But I've got nothing but respect for any parent out there who's doing his/her best. To each their own, right?
ReplyDeleteThat is exactly it. I feel kind of bad being used as an example to others, though I feel good to, because I know my friend means it out of admiration.
DeleteAs far as I am concerned, nearly everything in life ought to be exactly as you said: "To each their own".
What works for one person, may not work for another, so I feel like we each have to do our best for ourselves - not for anyone else.